The light at the end of the tunnel, I see it. I need it.
Basically every person at work stops me in the hallways to tell me I look tired, swollen, uncomfortable, in pain, am waddling, am walking so slow and awkwardly, insert anything about how shitty I look. I’ve probably heard it all at this point. I get it, I look like a miserable pile of pregnant. Thanks for the reminder, as if I couldn’t feel it for myself.
Other teachers who have had kids keep telling me to just be done. Just go out now. Take advantage. Rest while I can. But I have so much left to do before the quarter ends. I am just taking things week by week right now. But I am definitely ready to be done. My body is ready to be done. The 100 yard walk from my classroom to the main office feels like a death march some days. I mean, I’m barely sleeping as it is right now, but being off my feet and just relaxing sounds like heaven.
Baby size- Big enough to be out of room. Her head is so far down in my pelvis her hiccups feel like an echo in a cave. Her butt and knees are digging into my ribs though no matter where her head is. Sometime I try to push on her butt to make her move because she hurt my belly after a while. I push on her little bum way up by my ribs and feel it pressing her head into the back side of my cervix in response. Just nowhere in my 5’3″ frame left for her to go except out I guess, because my bump is falling forward now.
My size- Changing. I’m steadily gaining weight after going on an eight week weight plateau. Baby has also dropped quite a bit so the size and shape of my belly has changed, which others have been quick to point out to me.
My mood- Mixed. I’m pretty happy at home. I’m crabby at school. I think my mood is typically directly related to how I feel physically. I’m also back to having wild and irrational emotional bouts of crazy. I cried at a dog commercial and an episode of HIMYM that I’ve seen a gazillon times the other day.
I did get my maternity photos back Tuesday and they came out great! I liked a bunch of them, but I can’t help bu cringe at how puffy my face is right now. I’m such a narcissist.
Rings- I miss wearing my wedding rings. *sigh*
Symptoms- Lightning crotch. For real, that’s what it’s called. My doctor explained it being from baby’s head being pressed against my cervix and squishing the nerve that runs from there all the way down through my vagina and into my groin. Basically it’s a sharp pinching, stinging pain right in my cervix that often times knocks the wind out of me and stops me dead in my tracks.
I’m also still having contractions. My NST showed regular contractions for a second week in a row. This week they averaged 10% stronger too. Doctor was still not too concerned. They did have to give me juice and crackers half way through my NST though to get baby moving. Based on my two weeks of NST’s and last week’s ultrasound, Dr. Brown is guessing she’ll be early. He took a stab at saying week 38, which would be Thanksgiving week. I’d be happy with that, but I know babies come whenever they damn well please and I won’t be holding my breath on that prediction.
Food cravings- I impulse bought what is probably close to my body weight in applesauce Sunday at Wegmans. Otherwise I’m still just stuck on comfort foods since I don’t feel great.
Food aversions- Nothing too much
Exercise- Trying to keep up walking at this point. Shooting for those 10k steps everyday and 10 miles every week. We’ll see how that goes.
What I’m missing- Feeling human. I can barely walk right now, all though I sure am trying. I have to stop and wait out contractions a lot, or catch my breath from simple things like talking too much, or that pesky walking thing. My sleep is trashed and right now I have terrible sciatica centered directly in my right ass cheek that is seriously slowing me down and making getting up from laying or sitting horribly painful. I just want a solid 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep and a day with no weird pains. I am so ready for this kid to get here!
What I’m loving- Weekly appointments, amazingly enough. Yes, the two hour round trip drive sucks, but I really enjoy knowing what’s going on with my body and baby. This is my first pregnancy and every is new and weird. Even though it was complications that forced me to start weeklies four weeks earlier than is normal, I really appreciate understanding what’s going on with my body right now and being able to understand how that related to my upcoming labor. It’s very soothing and takes a lot of the anxiety out of waiting. And has probably spared my doctors a lot of excessive phones calls from a panicked me.
Next appointment- Friday at 9 am for another NST and OB check.